Today is probably one of the worst Fridays on my life. I feel like going to play some guitar hero. Today I had that test I told you about, and it went horribly. I don't think I got one answer right. Although there were only 4 questions on the test and probably no else did really great on that test either, I really hate myself for the way I performed on that test. I can't stand doing bad or at least know that I did bad on that test. Forgive me for typing so fast that I can't even check that what I'm writing is reading correctly but I honestly don't care right now. I don't care about anything right now and all I want to do is lay down and just sleep forever. I just want to sleep until at least I graduate from some college if not this one. That is becoming more and more of a reality to me everyday now. Which sucks, because I love it here and I definitely don't want to leave but I think God may have it in store for me to get kicked out of here, and go to school back home. My mind is racing right now, as I sit here at work, where my ex also works on the fifth floor and I want to just die and be buried already. I am beginning to not even care what happens to my life anymore just for the fact that I keep messing up and I keep having to fix what I do to myself and pretty soon I wont be able to fix every mistake that I make, I'll just have to live with them and thats going to suck, I can just feel it already.
This is probably the most crappy entry I've written so far but really honestly don't give a shit anymore. I wish I could've did it all differently and could've automatically came to SU and started out doing Information Technology and I wouldn't be worried about having to getting kicked out of this school for good now and having to go to Onadoga Community College, which sucks by the way. I am fucking starving out of my ass right now and I need to get a few slices of pizza and just play my PSP and clear my head. To anyone who is reading this, regardless of who you are and where your from or what your background is, just do me this one personal favor: say a little prayer for me.
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