Bodies lay in my wake and Im still on a path that continuers towards destruction. As I cruise through this city I think about my contacts and how few there are, but I also never forget each and every single woman I had, and how the bridge was burned but the gap was just a short leap away. M,N, S, J, and M again. Forgive me for anyone Im missing. I start work in 20 minutes and I have to be conscience of what I writing at this break room computer.
Its just crazy because I would have never predicted this for myself, and as much as Id like to say Id fucked up all those relationships......I didnt. I knew what was going where, and gave it that much effort if not a bit more just to see if I had underestimated my partner. I exceeded expectations in some areas and totally surprised them in others. I wasnt perfect but I certainly was a refresher for most.
But instead of thinking of them as failures Im beginning to notice that I a part of me turns into them. (the smarts ones I mean) I notice things about thier personality that I like or that make absolute sense and it wont leave me. Ive almost assimilated myself in one small way or another to something about the women Ive dated (i guess you could call it). Its been almost 2 years out the Big Game, and Im about to start playing for keeps.
Am I ready tho?
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